Bored? Listless? Help is at hand!
Pass away long, pointless hours with our bumper list of things to do when you're well and truly bored.
1. THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
Blink wildly and then close your eyes really tight for an interesting light show
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
See a variety of blobs, stars and
flashes. Try to make out shapes and see if your subconscious is trying
to send you a message (perhaps that funny shape is saying, 'send all
your money to Katherine Carreras'?)
See how long you can hold a note
(Amusement Potential: 4-20 minutes)
Not that much fun, but it sure
passes the time. Play with a friend, or try to beat your own personal
best. Inhale deeply and then try and make a noise for as long as you
can. Earn extra points for making your partner laugh or ending on an
amusing note.
Try to not think about penguins
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
This is especially hard, because
by trying too much, you remember what you were trying to avoid thinking
of. If you try too little, you end up thinking about penguins anyway.
Use your secret mind power
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Pick a passing by and try to use
your mind power to command them do something, like drop their bag or
knock into someone. The law of averages dictates that sooner or later
one of your mind commands will come true, so you can convince yourself
that you really have super human powers and waste even more time trying
them out.
Pretend you're a robot
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Walk down the street with
mechanical movements, adding 'zzzzzt' sounds with each motion.
Pretending to have a motor broken in, say, your left hand can add at
least 30 seconds more entertainment.
Scratch yourself
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Go ahead, scratch yourself now. Even if nothing itches, go ahead. Doesn't that feel pretty good?
Rate passers by
(Amusement Potential: 10-15 minutes)
Secretly award passers by marks
out of ten as you go along, offering (unsaid) expert criticism over
their clothing, hairstyle and footwear choices.
Repeat the same word over and over until it loses its meaning
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Pick a random word out of a magazine and say it aloud to yourself until it becomes a meaningless set of noises.
Pinch yourself
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
What is pain? Why is it
unpleasant? There's nothing physical about it - it's all in your mind.
Plus, after pinching yourself for awhile, boredom will seem nice next to
being in pain.
Try to swallow your tongue
(Amusement Potential: 1-2 minutes)
There's not much to say about this one. It is possible, but really stupid.
Pretend to be a car
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Make appropriate revving noises in your head as you walk along and add a
racing commentary as you pass strangers in the street. Use blinking
eyes as indicators for extra authenticity.
Make Star Trek door noises
(Amusement Potential: 1-2 minutes)
Stand by an electric door to a bank or something and make that silly
"Scccccccchwop" sound heard whenever people popped on to the bridge to
hang with Captain Kirk.
Look at something for awhile, shut eyes, study after image
(Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes)
Another great time waster. It
takes about 30 seconds of staring to create an after image, and the
image is then viewable for about the same length of time. Fun to combine
this one with pushing on your eyes.
Get yourself as nauseated as possible
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Best achieved by looking
straight up and spinning around. Try to be so dizzy you can't even stand
up. This is also entertaining due to the "makes boredom seem a lot
better" effect (see "Hurt Yourself").
Invent a weird twitch
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Adopt a bizarre twitch (e.g.
flicking your head irregularly, twitching with eye or busting out
sporadic cough noises) and try it out when you go shopping.
Make a low buzzing noise
(Amusement Potential: 15-30 minutes)
Hours of fun in libraries!
Keeping a totally straight face and looking nonchalant, make a low pitch
humming/buzzing noise and see who reacts.
Still bored? Still itching for something to do?
Keep wasting the hours away with our pointless list of things to do
2. THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH VERY LITTLE
See what's in your neighbour's rubbish/trash
(Amusement Potential: 20-30 minutes)
You can learn a lot about
people by what they throw out. You might uncover some dark secret about
them. Plus, they might be throwing out something with value that still
works, like a VCR or some porn mags.
Watch TV, repeat everything said in Italian accent
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Sort of entertaining. Include flamboyant shoulder shrugs for added impact, or go for a Marlon Brando set of grunts.
Send spooky emails
(Amusement Potential: 15-60 minutes)
Look up someone's CV on the
web, do some research on them via Google and then send them an email
full of personal references claiming to be an ex-work colleague who fell
in love with their shoes. Or something.
Play our useless games
(Amusement Potential: how long have you got?)
Waste away the hours with our collection of
useless games
Make prank phone calls
(Amusement Potential: 20-60 minutes)
Very entertaining, but requires discipline. Remember - vulgarities don't
make a call funny, but getting the other person to believe a ridiculous
story will. Try seeing if you can get them to make noises to 'test' the
line. One to get you started off: Call McDonalds with weird complaints
about their food.
Pretend all humans will die except for people in room with you
Amusement Potential: 10-20 minutes)
What would you do if this really
happened? Would the group stay together, or would there be factions?
Who would join what group? Remember, there would only be power for a few
days before the plants ran out of fuel or broke. To travel, you would
always have to be near cars to siphon gas out of. Best to do with people
you know.
Step off a curb with eyes shut, imagine it's a cliff
(Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes)
To get any benefit out of this
one, you have to have a good imagination. Don't step off immediately,
build up to the jump. Study the ravine below. Feel the winds at that
altitude. Step off and...AHHHHHH!!!!!
Try and sound Welsh
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
The key to sounding Welsh is to
make sure that your voice goes up at the end of the sentence, so that
everything sounds like a question. Throw in a superfluous 'isn't it?' at
the end of everything you say and you're halfway there. Isn't it?
Burn things with a magnifying glass
(Amusement Potential: 5-30 minutes)
Ants are always fun to use for
this, but burning the face of someone you don't like, under some
circumstances, can be just as entertaining.
No comments:
Post a Comment